I just received an email from Holt International welcoming us into the Ethiopian Program!!! It's now completely official, we are adopting from Ethiopia! We are SO excited! Along with that email came several attachments and a login ID and pin for other areas of their website. Now I'm looking at a bagillion page long guide book on their Ethiopia program! This is going to be SO much paperwork! I mean, I knew the dossier would have a lot but there are other things like uh, getting the child(ren) a visa! I wish they would just mail us the guide book so I don't have to look at it online but could just flip through it anytime, anywhere AND be able to check off pages as we completed whatever they said we needed to do. I may go through and print off some sections.
So now we need to raise some money for the homestudy. I'm working with a local Pampered Chef consultant to get a fundraiser show going. This show will be open to anyone, anywhere and 20% of the money spent will go right to us for our adoption! 20%, WOW!! So stay on the lookout for the link, I'm thinking next week, close to payday. ;) The show will be open for two weeks so start spreading the word NOW!!
Ok, well back to the bagillion page guide book!!
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
Friday, April 16, 2010
My response to the adoptions in the news
Ok so most of you have heard by now about the woman who returned her adopted son to Russia. If not, here's a link to just one of the many news stories http://www.nytimes.com/2010/04/10/world/europe/10russia.html?pagewanted=1
I had a friend send me one of the stories on wednesday after she read my blog about sending out our application. Now she did say she only thought of it because she read the article right before reading my blog. I appreciate her looking out for me. Thankfully, we've already been warned. A friend here in MO that has adopted three children already directed me to this blog/website http://www.thereisnomewithoutyou.com/blog?op=view&id=4 It's the story and advice of a woman that has adopted four children from Ethiopia and one from Bulgaria...after having four biological kids! I think I mentioned her in my first blog. I truly take her words to heart. I know it won't be easy BUT it will be worth it.
Too often people see adoption as all rainbows and butterflies, that as soon as you get that child out of the bad environment they were in as orphans that they will be so grateful, life will just be perfect. Seriously? No really, seriously? Do you know anyone that has had a bad experience in their past that even though they are out of the situation now, it doesn't have an affect on them? Think about people that were abused or had parents that were alcoholics. While they may not have an aggressive behavior now, that doesn't mean that those instances didn't affect how they live their life now. My question to Torry Hanson is, did you even try to get help? Nowhere that I have read said that they tried to get him help through a counselor or anything. This little seven year old boy was basically institutionalized after being removed from his home with an alcoholic mother that wasn't fit to take care of him. Now he's being sent to the other side of the world to a country he doesn't know, a language he doesn't understand to live with a woman he's never met. That would bring anger out of anybody!
She's not the only case though, there are many people that have had issues bringing home their adopted child and that child did not love them and they did not love that child. Does that mean that it never got better? For some it did not, but for most, absolutely. I think that unless you adopt an infant, you're going to have problems. (and even then you probably will!)
Honestly, I don't know how anybody can have a successful adoption of an older child without God. I don't know how anybody can even live day to day life without God but that's another blog! Without constant prayer before, during and after the adoption, how can anybody do anything?! Do I think we won't have problems when we bring home one or two children that have lost one or both of their parents to disease, starvation or poverty? Of course not. But I know, I know, I know, that God is always there with us, guiding us through any hardships we may have. To quote an amazing hymn "Oh what peace we often forfeit, oh what needless pain we bare, all because we do not carry everything to God in prayer".
So for those of you that may have gotten concerned about us through this story coming out, don't worry, pray. Pray for all of the people who are adopting orphans. Pray for the orphans. God tells us throughout His book to look after the orphans. Adoption is merely ONE of the ways that can be accomplished. Child sponsorship is a fantastic thing, if you don't already sponsor a child, you should seriously consider it. Well I think I'll get down from my soap box, for now at least. We're not worried in the slightest that we'll end up like Torry Hansen but it's because we're preparing ourselves, spiritually, mentally and physically....and by doing LOTS of research! Have a great weekend!
I had a friend send me one of the stories on wednesday after she read my blog about sending out our application. Now she did say she only thought of it because she read the article right before reading my blog. I appreciate her looking out for me. Thankfully, we've already been warned. A friend here in MO that has adopted three children already directed me to this blog/website http://www.thereisnomewithoutyou.com/blog?op=view&id=4 It's the story and advice of a woman that has adopted four children from Ethiopia and one from Bulgaria...after having four biological kids! I think I mentioned her in my first blog. I truly take her words to heart. I know it won't be easy BUT it will be worth it.
Too often people see adoption as all rainbows and butterflies, that as soon as you get that child out of the bad environment they were in as orphans that they will be so grateful, life will just be perfect. Seriously? No really, seriously? Do you know anyone that has had a bad experience in their past that even though they are out of the situation now, it doesn't have an affect on them? Think about people that were abused or had parents that were alcoholics. While they may not have an aggressive behavior now, that doesn't mean that those instances didn't affect how they live their life now. My question to Torry Hanson is, did you even try to get help? Nowhere that I have read said that they tried to get him help through a counselor or anything. This little seven year old boy was basically institutionalized after being removed from his home with an alcoholic mother that wasn't fit to take care of him. Now he's being sent to the other side of the world to a country he doesn't know, a language he doesn't understand to live with a woman he's never met. That would bring anger out of anybody!
She's not the only case though, there are many people that have had issues bringing home their adopted child and that child did not love them and they did not love that child. Does that mean that it never got better? For some it did not, but for most, absolutely. I think that unless you adopt an infant, you're going to have problems. (and even then you probably will!)
Honestly, I don't know how anybody can have a successful adoption of an older child without God. I don't know how anybody can even live day to day life without God but that's another blog! Without constant prayer before, during and after the adoption, how can anybody do anything?! Do I think we won't have problems when we bring home one or two children that have lost one or both of their parents to disease, starvation or poverty? Of course not. But I know, I know, I know, that God is always there with us, guiding us through any hardships we may have. To quote an amazing hymn "Oh what peace we often forfeit, oh what needless pain we bare, all because we do not carry everything to God in prayer".
So for those of you that may have gotten concerned about us through this story coming out, don't worry, pray. Pray for all of the people who are adopting orphans. Pray for the orphans. God tells us throughout His book to look after the orphans. Adoption is merely ONE of the ways that can be accomplished. Child sponsorship is a fantastic thing, if you don't already sponsor a child, you should seriously consider it. Well I think I'll get down from my soap box, for now at least. We're not worried in the slightest that we'll end up like Torry Hansen but it's because we're preparing ourselves, spiritually, mentally and physically....and by doing LOTS of research! Have a great weekend!
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
Application sent to Holt!!
Well we sent off our application today!! We'll be tight on money for the rest of the month but I think we can do it. The biggest problem will be groceries. We've been buying fresh, good for you food lately and well, that's more expensive. We've both lost weight already though! We're very excited to finally be official! So far it's been, "we're adopting but we haven't sent in our application yet", I've hated that. We may have to fight off a deployment to make this work but by golly I'm not giving up! I REFUSE to stop the whole process just because there are deployment orders for Chris' unit. There have been orders before and they've gotten canceled. And like I said, he may even be able to switch jobs before they deploy and not have to go with them!! He has a lot of options right now and we're optimistic. Well I have a kitchen table under a pile of crap that I need to clean up but I just wanted to share the news. :D
Thursday, April 8, 2010
No news, just bloggin'
So I wasn't going to post another blog until we mailed off our application but I have a lot on my mind so here goes.....
I've been trying to find how we can get certified copies of our birth certificates and our marriage certificate and I think I finally found the right place to call. It's so annoying though, do I call the counties we were born in, for Chris what about the one we're residents in OR do we call the capital of our states?! I found my certificate so I should be able to call tomorrow. Too bad they charge $10 per copy of the birth and $6 per copy of the marriage! I know what you're thinking though, "why can't I order them online these days?" well I could except it would be another $8 charge for the company that does it! Geesh! I thought this would be the easy part! I'm pretty sure we only need one certified copy of each but someone who has been through the international adoption process several times told me to have an extra set just in case. I think that's wise, especially since it takes about a month to get them.
I ordered a couple books on amazon the other day, one's a guide to international adoption and the other was written by a woman who adopted like 3 or 4 kids from Ethiopia (after having 4 of her own and adopting another from Bulgaria!). AND I ordered a language cd-rom so we can learn Amharic. =) You may be thinking how could I afford all this, but remember, it was amazon, less than $35 for all three including shipping. YAY! They all shipped already so I just have to wait. I need to get used to waiting I guess. Well I figure I already have been though........
Once we get paid (14th or 15th) we will mail off our application and be on our way! Oooo we do have to get something notorized, remind me to do that tomorrow. ;) I hate having to wait because of finances. Money sucks, let's go back to trading. I'll trade 5 baby blankets for the application fee, 10 stationary sets and a plethera of crocheted baby items and winter wear for the home study, birthday and celebration cakes and sewing and mending for life for the rest of the fees. See, that's simple. We have to come up with possibly as much as $2,500 for the homestudy before we can even apply for grants and such. The wise woman who suggested an extra copy of certificates also told me about a ministry called lifesong, check out their website http://www.lifesongfororphans.org/ we can apply (after having a completed homestudy) for a matching grant. That means, for every dollar we raise, they will match! My new friend raised $28,000 that way when adopting her last three (sibling group) out of her now ten children. So once we get this homestudy done, expect me do ask you for money hehe.
I did get some news today that kinda irritates me. Chris' unit has been up for deployment only to have it taken away probably four times just in the last year. Well now they're getting a little more serious about a deployment in 2011. While the Army does give the option to defer your deployment by four months in order to bond with a newly adopted child, if Chris is in command, he won't do it. I know, he's horrible right?! Just kidding babe, I know you have your duty. Well I suggested to him that perhaps, since his typical command time would be up during the deployment, and they may switch him out last minute anyways, to ask to be the rear detachment commander. For you non-military people, that just means he would stand in the place of the commander that is down range doing the things that are necessary for a physical body to be there. Clear as mud? Whenever a unit is deployed, a small skeleton crew stays back to manage things stateside. The Rear-D Commander is kinda like a substitute teacher of sorts. SO I suggested that Chris explain the situation and ask to be the rear-d commander since he already knows how to do the job. It's not an actual command position so it's totally do-able. AND our adoption may not even be complete by the time they go. He would have to use his R&R just to go pick up our children, most of that time would be travel and hardly any bonding time....not good. Here's the thing, we will not postpone the adoption for anything. There is no good time in the Army to adopt or to have children. Unless of course your soldier has some medical condition that prohibits him (or her) from deploying. Other wise just go for it and hope for the best! Now my hoping for the best of course is that Chris doesn't deploy. Not just that the timing will work out. He doesn't really mind deploying, he loves playing soldier boy BUT he hasn't had to leave any children behind and miss a lot of "firsts". So we'll see.
For some cheery-er news, I took the dogs to the vet today for regular check ups and there were a lot of kids in the waiting room. Now my pups are used to kids, get beat up by them and everything but usually in our home when they can leave if they've had enough. Well today they were stuck, I was holding their leashes and sometimes their collars to keep them from lunging to go play with the other puppies there. The two girls right next to me kept coming up and petting the dogs, they were about two and four. Well the two year old kept grabbing their tails and saying "I like his tail, it's happy" (they were wagging of course). Well I wasn't sure what the dogs would do with a little girl grabbing their tail and jerking it around, especially with me holding them down by their collar. BUT they did NOTHING! Sure they may have looked back at her but never did they pull away or growl or anything! YAY!! I knew they were good with kids but wow!
Ok I promise not to do super long blogs every time. I guess I just needed to share. :) As my little sister always reminded us "Jesus wants us to share". Have a great weekend! OH and check out the flare I have over to the left. Got that idea from some other bloggers. Click on the flag, click on the flag!
I've been trying to find how we can get certified copies of our birth certificates and our marriage certificate and I think I finally found the right place to call. It's so annoying though, do I call the counties we were born in, for Chris what about the one we're residents in OR do we call the capital of our states?! I found my certificate so I should be able to call tomorrow. Too bad they charge $10 per copy of the birth and $6 per copy of the marriage! I know what you're thinking though, "why can't I order them online these days?" well I could except it would be another $8 charge for the company that does it! Geesh! I thought this would be the easy part! I'm pretty sure we only need one certified copy of each but someone who has been through the international adoption process several times told me to have an extra set just in case. I think that's wise, especially since it takes about a month to get them.
I ordered a couple books on amazon the other day, one's a guide to international adoption and the other was written by a woman who adopted like 3 or 4 kids from Ethiopia (after having 4 of her own and adopting another from Bulgaria!). AND I ordered a language cd-rom so we can learn Amharic. =) You may be thinking how could I afford all this, but remember, it was amazon, less than $35 for all three including shipping. YAY! They all shipped already so I just have to wait. I need to get used to waiting I guess. Well I figure I already have been though........
Once we get paid (14th or 15th) we will mail off our application and be on our way! Oooo we do have to get something notorized, remind me to do that tomorrow. ;) I hate having to wait because of finances. Money sucks, let's go back to trading. I'll trade 5 baby blankets for the application fee, 10 stationary sets and a plethera of crocheted baby items and winter wear for the home study, birthday and celebration cakes and sewing and mending for life for the rest of the fees. See, that's simple. We have to come up with possibly as much as $2,500 for the homestudy before we can even apply for grants and such. The wise woman who suggested an extra copy of certificates also told me about a ministry called lifesong, check out their website http://www.lifesongfororphans.org/ we can apply (after having a completed homestudy) for a matching grant. That means, for every dollar we raise, they will match! My new friend raised $28,000 that way when adopting her last three (sibling group) out of her now ten children. So once we get this homestudy done, expect me do ask you for money hehe.
I did get some news today that kinda irritates me. Chris' unit has been up for deployment only to have it taken away probably four times just in the last year. Well now they're getting a little more serious about a deployment in 2011. While the Army does give the option to defer your deployment by four months in order to bond with a newly adopted child, if Chris is in command, he won't do it. I know, he's horrible right?! Just kidding babe, I know you have your duty. Well I suggested to him that perhaps, since his typical command time would be up during the deployment, and they may switch him out last minute anyways, to ask to be the rear detachment commander. For you non-military people, that just means he would stand in the place of the commander that is down range doing the things that are necessary for a physical body to be there. Clear as mud? Whenever a unit is deployed, a small skeleton crew stays back to manage things stateside. The Rear-D Commander is kinda like a substitute teacher of sorts. SO I suggested that Chris explain the situation and ask to be the rear-d commander since he already knows how to do the job. It's not an actual command position so it's totally do-able. AND our adoption may not even be complete by the time they go. He would have to use his R&R just to go pick up our children, most of that time would be travel and hardly any bonding time....not good. Here's the thing, we will not postpone the adoption for anything. There is no good time in the Army to adopt or to have children. Unless of course your soldier has some medical condition that prohibits him (or her) from deploying. Other wise just go for it and hope for the best! Now my hoping for the best of course is that Chris doesn't deploy. Not just that the timing will work out. He doesn't really mind deploying, he loves playing soldier boy BUT he hasn't had to leave any children behind and miss a lot of "firsts". So we'll see.
For some cheery-er news, I took the dogs to the vet today for regular check ups and there were a lot of kids in the waiting room. Now my pups are used to kids, get beat up by them and everything but usually in our home when they can leave if they've had enough. Well today they were stuck, I was holding their leashes and sometimes their collars to keep them from lunging to go play with the other puppies there. The two girls right next to me kept coming up and petting the dogs, they were about two and four. Well the two year old kept grabbing their tails and saying "I like his tail, it's happy" (they were wagging of course). Well I wasn't sure what the dogs would do with a little girl grabbing their tail and jerking it around, especially with me holding them down by their collar. BUT they did NOTHING! Sure they may have looked back at her but never did they pull away or growl or anything! YAY!! I knew they were good with kids but wow!
Ok I promise not to do super long blogs every time. I guess I just needed to share. :) As my little sister always reminded us "Jesus wants us to share". Have a great weekend! OH and check out the flare I have over to the left. Got that idea from some other bloggers. Click on the flag, click on the flag!
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